How to Stay Steady and Make Better Decisions in Uncertain Times
Lessons from twenty-five years of difficult decisions, changing plans and learning as I went
“The only thing that makes life possible is permanent, intolerable uncertainty: not knowing what comes next.”
As another birthday passes, I’m reflecting on what I’ve learned from working with leaders, sitting in rooms where difficult decisions were made, and making plenty of difficult decisions myself.
Some of these lessons I learned from research. Some from people wiser than me. Quite a lot of it I learned by getting things wrong, changing my mind, or finding out that something I thought mattered very much really didn't. The rest I learned the slower way.
I am still learning. These are some things I think are worth knowing.
As you read them, which ones did you already know, and which ones did you have to learn the hard way?
Things look worse at eleven at night than they do at seven the next morning. If a decision can wait until the morning, leave it until then.
Rest before you need it and keep something in reserve, because life tends to ask more of you at the worst possible time. Saying no to something is often the easiest way to make that space.
When you are deeply tired, you can sleep for ten hours and still wake up with nothing in the tank. Time off, exercise, laughing and doing something with no point to it all help, and it can take a while to know which one you need.
You are allowed to be pleased with yourself. Give it a few weeks and it will feel ordinary, so enjoy it while it still feels like an achievement.
Remember what you have already come through. There will be days when you need reminding of how resilient you are.
Write down what you are worried about today and put a note in your diary to read it back in a year. Researchers found that most of what people worry about never happens.
Some of the most useful work you can do has no deadline attached to it. Writing down how something is done, spending time with a key stakeholder or training up the person who will take over, does nothing for you today but makes it easier into the future.
Protect time to think. When every slot in your calendar is full, you lose the room to come up with anything new.
Some things really are urgent. Others are just demanding. And many of them only became urgent because nobody dealt with them while there was still time.
Being the reliable one is a role people are very happy to keep giving you. You are allowed to hand some of it back.
There is far more to read than anyone can get through. Deciding what you are not going to read is part of the job now.
Be careful with anyone who tells you something is always true or never true. Most of the hard questions I have dealt with did not have a clear answer.
Say the obvious thing and ask the question you are embarrassed to ask. Sometimes an entire room is waiting for somebody else to go first.
You will be completely certain about something and completely wrong, and you may not find out for years. The people I have trusted most are the ones who admitted when that happened to them.
You see more when you have been around a while. You can also stop noticing things, because you have seen something like this before and you assume you know how it goes.
Listen carefully to people who see things differently from you, especially when you would rather they agreed.
Ask what you are missing more often than you try to prove you are right.
Somebody in your organisation probably knows the uncomfortable thing you most need to know. Whether they tell you usually depends on what they saw happen to the last person who spoke up.
If nobody brings you problems, do not assume you have fewer problems.
Nobody steadies an organisation on their own. Think about who you would want beside you in a bad week, and build those relationships while things are calm, because you cannot start them on the day.
Be suspicious of any plan that needs everything to go right.
Hope on its own is not a plan. Work out what you will do if it goes the other way, and then you can hope as much as you like.
Just because something is allowed does not mean it is a good idea. Some of the worst decisions I have seen were completely within the rules.
I have never seen a business case that was pessimistic about time or money. Add some room, and then add a bit more.
Before you make a significant decision, ask who else will have to live with the consequences.
Work out in advance what you are not prepared to lose. Once you know where your limit is, you can say yes to things much more easily.
The people who tell you when you are wrong are rarer than you think, and they are often the first to leave.
Your reputation comes from what people have seen you do over the years. You cannot control what everyone thinks of you, and you can keep giving them reasons to trust you.
Be clear about the few things you will not give up, whatever is going on around you. It might be how you treat people, or something you promised at home. Most other things can change.
Changing your plan is not the same as giving up on what you wanted. People confuse those two more often than you would expect.
Make room for a life outside work. Go to the theatre. Run. Make something. Walk near the water. See people you love. Stay interested in things that have nothing to do with your job. Do not wait for work to settle down before you start living the rest of your life.
You do not need to be unshakeable. You need to know what matters to you, who you can turn to, and how to find your footing again when things change.
If this resonated, I'd love to hear what comes up for you. And if you know someone who might benefit from reading it, please feel free to share.
